A Problem Turned Party

A few years ago a creative genius named Tom Morely told me -- in much nicer words than these -- that I was an uptight square and lacked imagination. I responded by studiously avoiding any contact with him for the next 12 months. Of course this wasn't so difficult given that he lived in London and I in Texas.

We next met on a course called Seven Days of Creation in England. I had thought often about Tom's feedback to me but I still wasn't taking it all that well.  I knew I had something to learn from him, but I freely admit I was being dragged to the learning kicking and screaming like a little boy to a bath.

As luck -- and the trainers -- would have it, Tom and I were assigned to a project along with two other members of the group.  Doing this project with my group opened my eyes to the creativity within me but perhaps more importantly, I found myself grateful and humbled by the rare gift of someone who cared enough about me to help me see my blind spots.  At our project's successful end, I saw both Tom and myself through different eyes.

A year or so later while working, I had what could fairly described as a break-down.  Through a series of teachable moments, I had finally come face to face with my own propensity toward rigidness and driven-ness -- and it was not pretty.  The cold hard truth was difficult to face alone so I called up my friend Tom.  I asked him for some straight up advice -- how could I break the back of the accusations in my mind that kept pushing me toward perfectionism and away from creativity?

His advice was practical.  He said that in his own life whenever he found himself stuck in a corner with either no way out or only one way out, he knew he needed to collaborate.  He said that when he brought other people into the conversation (rather than it all being between him and his ego!), creativity flourished and driven-ness wilted.

That has turned out to be one of the most life-giving things I have ever learned.  Some times it takes some discipline to choose to collaborate and at times some creativity to decide whom to ask, but there is a big payoff for doing so.  Every time I take a "problem" and turn it into an opportunity to collaborate, it becomes a party.  It's mind-boggling. 

Earlier this week, my Wii died.  This is more serious a problem than it sounds, because my Wii Fit Plus was my entire plan for exercise the next day.  I woke up the next morning pretty grumpy and seeing that corner.  So as I often have in the past couple of years, I remembered Tom's advice.  I messaged several of my friends and asked for help.  By the end of the day I had burned more than 800 calories and had an absolute ball doing it.  It was fun.  In fact, it was a blast!

So the next time the corners of your mouth are pointing down and your jaw is tight, take Tom's advice.  Look and see with whom you can collaborate and turn that problem into a party.  Cheers!

Practical New Year's Party Tips

One of my friends used to call me "Heloise." If you aren't familiar with Heloise, she was a columnist who provided tips. Practical stuff, like uses for Leggs Eggs and how to make a scrubby out of nylon net.

I'm a practical and thrifty person by nature. Here are my "between the holidays" tips that are both economically and socially responsible and will help you get ready for celebrating the New Year:

• If the garbage hasn't been collected yet, it's not too late to re-use that wrapping paper! Run it through the shredder and save it in a big garbage bag for the next time you need to pad a package for shipping.
  
• Inexpensive holiday dishes are deeply discounted now in grocery stores. You can actually buy the dishes less expensively than a package of paper plates, and you can reuse them. I've been buying a box or two a year and now have enough for all our holiday parties. I just use them thoughout Christmas and New Years and then pack them in the attic until next year. In these days of dishwashers, there's no reason to use throw-away plates. True - they aren't fine china - but they're nicer than paper!
  
• Instead of buying those one-use plastic champagne glasses, buy inexpensive glass ones. IKEA and many grocery stores sell them for 50 cents a stem! OR -- ask your guests to bring their own glass. As each guest arrives, tie a unique ribbon around the stem (leftover from Christmas, of course), so they can keep track of their glass.
• Craft stores sell holiday plastic cups for kids as cheaply as single use ones. Buy a couple stacks for the kids then store them after the holidays.
• Instead of buying those silly mylar decorations, consider using what you have on hand. Old champagne bottles and corks make great decorations with a little curly ribbon or star wire. Fill a glass bowl with glass tree ornaments. A vase filled with cranberries or a larger container with oranges or lemons is festive. Baby food jars embellished with glitter or ribbon make pretty tea light holders.
• It takes 10 minutes to fix a fresh vegetable tray and it will taste better, look prettier, and cost half of buying it pre-made. Plus you aren't contributing that giant plastic tray to your local landfill

That should be enough to help you channel your inner Heloise!

Have a happy and safe New Year's celebration!